Womanhood: Where Did Feminism Go So Wrong?

I get really sad and angry when I think about how young women today are systematically dismantling the work of early feminist icons. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that your average teen girl or young millennial couldn’t even [name one] feminist.

I get why young celebs become narcissists and post a zillion sexy, nude and semi-nude photos of themselves on their social media accounts. I get that it is expected of them and that it has become the norm. If you do it, you get more followers and in turn, you get more famous. Mind you Taylor Swift is pretty famous and she seems to keep it classy.

IF you are not a celebrity, I just don’t get it. What sort of message are you putting out when you all look, act and present the same? Why do you think you are so important (or as I suspect: unimportant and using your social media to falsely inflate your self esteem)? Why do you think your only value is as a decoration for men?

You get a tattoo – ooh so edgy because no one else has tattoos right?

You pierce your face – ooh so trashy it’s ironic. At best it’s Socratic irony but really it just illustrates that you are an automaton.

You post the obligatory #nofilter photo - it took you 300 tries to get this photo before you uploaded it but hey, you didn’t use an Instagram filter. For the record though, heavy makeup is also a FILTER!

You post a photo of yourself wearing nerdy glasses – ooh you’re so smart. Maybe you even read! Wow good for you!.

You post a headless body shot - ooh look at me, look at me - I’m nothing more than my body and I can’t wait to see how many guys ‘like’ this and comment ‘hawt’ or ‘bae’ or ‘so sexy.’

You post pointless drawings that you probably drew when you were high - ooh you’re a shitty artist. How ironic!


You post revealing scantily clad shots or gym photos/yoga poses or photos of your eating clean – great you are trying to show us your good genes and make all the girls who don’t look like that feel bad. Well done.

You post mirror selfies of you in the change room trying on clothes or carrying shopping bags or laying out your new clothes on your bed – wow you shop! Amazing and thanks for letting us in on your amazing secret world of conspicuous consumerism.

You post pictures of yourself drunk and/or high and you hastag them so we know that you are ‘420 friendly’ or ‘drunkAF’ or a ‘stonerbabe’ -- ooh look I treat my body like a trash bin.

Yeah, you’re definitely furthering the cause of women. You are taking us into what will surely be a very dark future. A future where the next generation of young women are nothing more than cum dumpsters for self-centered men who see us as objects rather than subjects. Strong work. Gloria Steinem has a famous quote:

“Far too many people are looking for the right person, instead of trying to BE the right person.”

Yes feminism fought for the right for women to be equal to men and that included sexual equality but once you put it out there for all the world to see, you’ve diminished it. You’ve cheapened it. Your hookup culture has set women back sexually. Believe it or not, it hasn’t empowered anyone. Taking the intimacy and value out of sex does not make you womanly and sexy – it makes you like a man in all the wrong ways.

Pouty lips. winged eyeliner and over drawn brows (on fleek? Eff OFF with that!) does not make you sexy – it shows that you are trying to be sexy. Sexy is innate. It is at the core of you being authentic. It is not something you put on (tight crop top or on trend tshirt anyone?) or take off. Getting high or drunk does not make you sexy – it shows that you will be easier to get into bed than girls who don’t get drunk or high. Look we’ve all gotten drunk and/or high and fucked someone. Does it make us feel empowered? Sexy? No not really. Is the sex great? No, it’s terrible. You are sprayed with regret among other things. It makes us feel bad because it IS bad for us.

Booze and drugs lower any inhibitions you might have, but it also lowers your standards. It alters your judgement – which judging from a great deal of social media posts is already questionable. All you’ve found is a sexual fairy tale that you’ve manufactured yourself. It’s not sustainable. It’s not real. It’s not enriching your life. It’s not going to help you find a partner. It’s not going to live up to the fantasy you’ve built in your head. It’s not going to help your career. It diminishes your EI or Emotional Intelligence – how we understand, identify and manage our emotions which allow us to handle stress, communicate in a meaningful way and have empathy).

To put it bluntly – ALL of this crap just helps to put a target on your back. It makes you and all of us, an object. If young women continue this, they will erase everything that the women before them fought for. I wonder if you women realize that it is YOU who is the enemy. I wonder if you realize that you are the metaphorical monster under the bed. I wonder if you realize as you strip away your clothes, you strip away your dignity. I wonder if you realize that the reason you are even able to post trashy pictures of yourself is because of feminism. I doubt it.

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